Crazy obsessed over boyfriend, what do I do?
My boyfriend and I usted to see eachother all the time, always do things together. Recently we barely see eachother. Only after work. And he normally just falls asleep. He works 13 hrs a day and has one day off. I sit at home alone. All day every day. We recently moved so he can be closer to work so I havint gotten my life situated yet. I don't have a job yet.
I constantly think about him. Just about every second of the day. I get jellous that he's out enjoying his life while I'm sitting here thinking of him. He always comes home and seems so happy. When we fight I freak out and cry like a baby while he tells me to back off and I'm annoying. I'm so scared to loose him cause he's literally all I have at this time of my life. I'm very lonely at this point so the only think I look ford to is seeing him after a long boring day. When he gets here I follow him around the house like a lost puppy. Then after about an hour he falls asleep. I make his dinner every day an do his laundry. I'm very jellous of his success, outgoing ness. I would go absolutely inside if he broke up with me. I obsess and think of him all day, and I make myself mad with thoughts of his past and everything. He doesint give me time anymore and I feel like I'm going insane.
You sound like an amazing girlfriend, one who's truly dedicated to your partner. In my house though it's me who tends to follow my girlfriend around, and do everything for her!
I think though it is important to appreciate ourselves, learn to love yourself, perhaps get a hobby or join a club, maybe take up painting, or sewing for when he's out, you can't just sit around, that's a waste of existence!
You should definitely bring this up with him though, and maybe ask him to take more time off work to be with you. There's a saying "we should work to live, not live to work", and this couldn't be more true, I hold resentment for my father because he was himself a workaholic, it's not good, partners should come first along with families, perhaps try telling him this, but try to be gently about it.
Woah woah woah. Dude you gotta chill. Stop obsessing over him. You both should have your separate lives and time together of course. He can't be everything you have and you shouldn't be everything he has. You really really need to find some hobbies and get serious about finding a job. You need to occupy your time and form your own life too. You shouldn't be spending those 13 hours every day waiting for him to come home. Do something productive to fill the time and stop this crazy cycle of stressing about him. Working 13 hours and coming home to a needy girlfriend who clings to you like a lost puppy can be quite frankly annoying. You gotta get comfortable with yourself and do something so instead of clinging to him you can share with each other your different experiences.
You seem to be very insecure, and do not have a life outside of him… You really need to consider finding things to do with your time. And if he's tired after a 13 hour work day, who can blame him?
Stop fighting with him. If he's upset or feeling cranky, just be as understanding as possible, and don't cause drama. This is going to push him away, along with the clingy stuff.
Everyone has a different life situation. And if you don't like yours, you will have to change things for yourself.
First of all, get a life. You will loose him if you continue on this needy course. Get involved in your community, get a job, get friends. No relationship will make it if both people are not ok with their own lives.
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